Six books to read if you're dealing with family estrangement

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Becoming estranged from a loved one is never easy.

It can also be an incredibly lonely experience, despite the fact that it may also feel liberating.

If you’re wondering who to turn to, why not start by turning some pages, with these six book recs which focus on themes of estrangement.

From why it may have happened and how it impacts you, to tools and techniques to repair relationships or let them go – there’s something for everyone.

Not every broken relationship has to be fixed, sometimes it’s just about healing yourself.

You can read more about estrangement, in Metro.co.uk’s Degrees of Separation series, which explores familial estrangement in all it’s forms.

It Didn’t Start With You by Mark Wolynn

There are many reasons why we might be estranged from a family member and in many cases, that issue didn’t start with us.

The root of our trauma, when it comes to family, could very well be inherited and have a massive impact on shaping who we grow to be.

Wolynn helps us identify these patterns and provides methods to help us reclaim our lives.

Buy the paperback for £14.23 at Amazon.

Girl In Pieces by Kathleen Glasgow

This novel has the BookTok stamp of approval exploring the heart-breaking but triumphant journey of Charlie Davis.

She’s no stranger to loss and with a mother who had nothing left to give her, Charlie finds herself somewhat alone.

But in sunny Arizona she begins to reclaim her life and put herself back together.

Buy the paperback for £5.50 at Amazon.

Rules of Estrangement by Joshua Coleman

This book is an empathetic understanding of the feelings of both the parent and the estranged adult child.

Coleman touches on the one-sided views of estrangement: the parents who got what they deserved and the ungrateful child. But it’s in fact a lot more nuanced.

This book gives parents the language and emotional tools to navigate a constructive and meaningful conversation with their child (if there is a relationship to be salvaged), but it also helps equip them to move on if reconciliation is no longer possible.

Buy the paperback for £13.20 at Amazon.

Whole again by Jackson MacKenzie

Whole Again focuses on the aftermath of what may have caused the estrangement between family members and how to heal from any abuse the reader has experienced.

Just because your relationship is over, it doesn’t mean the trauma disappears, but MacKenzie provides the right tools to help us move on.

Topics addressed include: complex PTSD, Narcissistic abuse, Avoidant Personality Disorder, Co-dependency, Core wounding, toxic shame and Borderline Personality Disorder.

Buy the paperback for £11.99 at Amazon.

Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood

This book focuses on what perhaps is a by-product of estrangement, which is making your romantic partner the most important thing in your life.

Obsessing over a partner who is undeserving, or attempting to make an unhealthy relationship work isn’t healthy.

Norwood shares an effective framework to help us find and sustain the love we deserve.

Buy the paperback for £9.85 at Amazon.

The Power of Letting Go by John Purkiss

Purkiss says that when you let go, you live intuitively because you are no longer attached to things being a certain way.

Clinging on for dear life is no way to live, so this book contains tried and tested techniques that will allow us to let go.

The way to let go is to be present and enjoy the moment and surrender to tune in to something else.

Buy the paperback for £9.48 at Amazon.

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